What to do if you see your ex

Even if you broke up a long time ago, your ex-partner can sometimes influence your mood a lot and provoke lots of unpleasant and unwanted feelings and emotions in you. If you want to feel confident and relaxed when unexpectedly meeting your ex, then you should learn some simple rules and follow them. Your ex-partners are just a part of your past experiences, so don’t let them influence your present!

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an anxious woman at the psychologist

Going through a breakup, you can get totally overwhelmed by the feeling of loss. Whether it was just a casual intrigue or a long-term relationship, losing contact with a person who used to be so close is tough. And when you see your ex, even if a meeting is accidental, it’s just a reminder of good times and a reason for drowning in upsetting thoughts.

Social media with all its simplicity to unite people has yet become another hardship of overcoming the feelings after breaking up. You can delete your ex’s number, unfollow them on Facebook and Instagram, but still see their posts and photos whenever your mutual friends like them. And if you decide to fill the void by joining a dating website, running into their profile at some point is very much likely.

Whether your ways cross in real life or online resources keep sending you back to the good old days, it’s frustrating to decide how to act. But remember, this is something that happens very often and nobody is alone in this trouble. So here is what to do in case you meet your ex anywhere.

Stay positive

a man talking to a woman outdoors

Sure you can be hurt a lot by the breakup and have a lot of offences to remember. Running into an ex you might immediately want to release all the negativity that has been kept inside. But remember you are not the only one being overwhelmed by emotions and memories. Whether it was a mutual decision that you didn’t work out as a couple or one of you dumped the other, run-ins are awkward for both. You’ll definitely have your chance to experience more mature dating later.

No matter how much you want revenge, hurting your ex is a road that leads nowhere.

So if a conversation happens, try being as polite and cheerful as possible. This way nobody will get insulted, but they might remember how precious you used to be and what they lost by breaking up.

Remember the reasons

As time passes forgetting the faults that used to be in relationships is natural. So seeing an ex-boyfriend or girlfriend raises past feelings and can bring up a desire to uniting again. Especially if there hasn’t been long since you stopped being a couple, it is usual to simply miss the times you were together.

But keep in mind that everything happened for a reason. The decision of ending a love affair is always a tough one, so if something led either of you to the conclusion that it is necessary, then there was enough basis for it.

Keep in mind what initially led to thinking about a possibility of a breakup. If you were cheated on, don’t justify such actions and imagine that a person might change if you come together again. Don’t make the same mistake of trusting the wrong one again.

Behave in the ordinary way

Imagine what you would do if it was just a friend who you haven’t seen for a long time. Probably the right topic to talk about would be about the events that happened since the last meeting and simply discussing whatever you had in common.

If you happen to run into your ex at a party or just in town behave that way. Basically, it is not so hard to imagine this is just another of your friends. This is a person who used to be the closest to you, who used to share their whole life with you and the breakup doesn’t mean it all just vanished. Whatever prevented you from being together doesn’t imply you became less of a person of interest for each other.

Use the right social media

a man using his smartphone while smiling

While seeing your ex in real life is a thing that won’t happen often, especially living in a big city, coming across social media profiles or seeing a picture when swiping on a dating app is not as rare. So do everything to prevent yourself from getting constant reminders. Delete them on every social media or even put them on your blacklist so that you don’t get to see any of their materials because of mutual friends.

Deciding on a desire to move on and trying to look for a further partner, remember to use the right tools. By joining certain apps or websites you are putting yourself at the risk of running into your ex’s profile. Not only won’t you know what to do but also it is simply an unpleasant experience.

So while choosing a website or app to start looking for a relationship, be interested in such places as Dating.com. Here are some of our benefits:

  • It’s hardly possible to see your ex on Dating.com because the algorithm here is not oriented towards constant swiping and matching;
  • It allows you to look through the list of people and choose certain settings so that you only get the pool of individuals that already match your preferences;
  • And if your ex still comes up somehow, there is a hard chance of even noticing it among the choice of other great options.
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